The Biggest Winner
by bella-emily-cullen
Summary: All VAMPIRE.After DB.When Bella and Edward have to play truth and dare the Cullen way. What are the rules? Rated M for limes, violents, perverted scenes, and issues but mostly VIOLENET! YEAH VIOLENTS!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of its characters*sighs*. I just manipulate them like my own little puppets*rubs hands together and laughs madly*. 2 guys in white put me in a restrain jacket and wheel me away.**

**Chapter 1:**

**Emmett's Big**

**Mouth**

Bpov

Me and Edward were sitting on the couch watching a movie with the rest of the family (including Jacob, I made him sit all the way on the other side of the room so he would touch Renesmee now that she looked 16). Suddenly Emmett jumped from his sit on the other couch opposite us. Rose hit the ground quickly and just as fast stood up and whacked Emmett's head.

"Ouch, Rosie! What was that for?" Complained Emmett while rubbing the back of his head.

"Why the hell did you stand up for when I'm sitting on your lap?" Rosalie screeched at him.

"I'm bored! This movie is stupid! I mean come on POWER RANGERS! I need to do something other than this!" Emmett groaned.

Renesmee stood up "Power Rangers are uber cool!" with a pout that reminded me of my own. I smiled at that.

"Oh, no they aren't they are!" Emmett started too advanced on her small form. Sudden she started to dry sob. I and Edward stood up. A growl ripped though our chests. Irrationally I leaped towards a horrified Emmett while Edward grabbed our daughter.

We landed on the couch when I slapped him across the face "Don't make her ever cry again!"

"That hurt Bella! You don't have to hit me so hard!" Emmett rubbed the spot I had hit.

"Apologize." I stated simply.

He looked sadly at Renesmee then smiled a bit "I'm sorry. But not as much as Jaky gonna be!"

I snapped my head towards them. Renesmee and Jacob were on the couch in much the same position me and Edward were in.

Jacob looked at me with worry "Now Bella. Please be rational. I was just comforting her. You know I love her." He stuttered as he put Renesmee down on the couch and backed away slowly.

"Oh, I'll be rational." I said sweetly. He seemed to calm down but then I hissed "As soon as your head is off of your body!"

I slammed him against the wall "What was our condition of letting you stay here!"

"That I wouldn't touch her!" he whimpered.

"That's right! And now you're going to go back to your house and think about what you did for the next week! Because you're not allowed to back till then!" I hissed at him.

"A whole week! I won't live that long!" he complained.

"That's too bad for you because that's my decision! Now get your wolf butt out here!" I told him with a smile along my face.

He groaned before running out to the woods, turning into a wolf and running away.

I wore a triumphant smile as I returned. The movie had just ended. Everyone else beside Edward, Rose, Renesmee, and Emmett seemed unphased by what had just taken place. I flicked on the lights. Renesmee stretched and yawned in Edward's arms.

I scooped her up into my arms "You tried, Honey?" she nodded while wiping her eye. Edward walked behind us silently.

We ran to her room and gently tuck her when Edward spoke up "Do you want us to read you something?"

"No, I'm really tried already." Renesmee just whispered before drifting off to her dream.

We watched her until she was deep into her before heading back downstairs hand-in-hand with Edward.

Emmett had a grin from ear to ear "Now that the littles people are away it's time for grown-ups to play!"

I scoff while Edward was toying with a piece of my hair "What are you talking about Emmett?"

His grin just got bigger. Edward dropped my hair. I turned to him "What's wrong?" I asked attentively.

Edward just barley stuttered "He wants to play! We have to run for our lives and dignity!"

He quickly turned on his heels and ran for the back door with me right behind him. I had no clue what he was talking about but I had never seen him so scared in my life so it must have meant something.

Alice was too fast for us and shoved just into Emmett grip "Time to play!" he grinned as he handcuffed us together and then to the wall.

"Edward what does he want from us!" I cryed trying to brake the handcuffs but it was no use.

Edward looked at me frantily at me "He wants us to play the biggest winner!"


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. But I do own the rules. Are you ready for it *little girl runs as she pisses her pants after reading the rules***

**Chapter 2:**

**The Rules**

Bpov

"Ok Bella we're going to the biggest winner. It's just like truth or dare but better!" Alice squealed.

"Rule 1: When you spin the bottle who ever it lands on you truth or dare them but you can't dare your mate." Alice continued "Rule 2: You have to spin the bottle at human pace and can't mess with its direction." she looked at Emmett as she said this "Rule 3: If you pick truth Emmett has to pick it for you. Rule 4: If you pick truth your out of the game-

"Then I pick- Alice covered my mouth.

She smiled at me "Wait for me to finish!" she removed her hand and waited as if she was seeing if I wanted said more but I kept it shut.

"If you pick truth you can't you can't see your mate for a month." she smiled.

"What!" my mouth hung open.

Alice started ticking off her fingers as she said each one "That means no phone contact. No texting. No writing letters or poems or anything of the sort. No recordings. No e-mails. No Renesmee."

"Why!" I groaned.

"Because she looks like both of you so it's like having a different version of each of you. Plus you could tell her to each other messages. And she could show you a picture of the other. Oh and no pictures, clothing, or anything with the others scent." Alice explained.

"Rule 5: No having sex or kissing during the game unless it's part of the dare." Jasper cut in.

"And last but not least the only way to finish the game is if someone picks truth." Alice finished.

"Emmett get the bottle." Rose said.

I groaned here we go I thought.

Emmett squealed "Let the games begin!"


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. But if u believe children all of **_**my**_** dreams will come true.**

_Italic _= thoughts

**Chapter 3:**

**Emmett's Spin**

Epov

Emmett grinned "I'll spin it first." and all eyes shifted to him "_This better land on you Eddie"_

And he started to angle it just as youtube instructed him and it really landed on me "Yeah, youtube rules!" throwing his fist in the air triumphantly.

I sighed "What's the dare?" suddenly I saw his plan "No fucking way!"

Bella looked at me worryingly "What's wrong?" she asked cautionly.

Emmett broke out in laughter and between fits said "Edward and Jasper… have too… go in the metal room… naked… while me… and Rose… go up stairs… and have some fun for an hour!" this broke him into another set of laughter.

"Emmett!" Alice broke over his laugh "We had a deal!"

Emmett calmed down "Well I lied, so deal."

Alice looked shocked but Emmett just grabbed Jasper's wrist ripped off his clothes threw him in the room unhooked me and was just about to my clothes off to when my angel stood up rapidly kicked Emmett across the room along with me. No one saw that coming.

Bella's growl ripped though the room "No fucking way am I letting Jasper ass rape Edward!"

Emmett didn't said anything but ripped my clothes off and handcuffed me to the metal room. He slamed the door and I heard him and Rose run to their room.

Then Bella calming thoughts came to me "Thanks, love." I called to her but she didn't answer and continued to think peaceful thoughts and Alice joined in too. This had both and Jasper a lot more at ease but as much as I concentrated on her thoughts Emmett's dirt mind came popping up.

Me and Jasper had about 20 minutes left and Rose and Emmett were really turning the lust level up. Not to mention the fact that the room was getting really hot.

Jasper's voice came in a weird half stragled mummer mixed with a pain and fear withed growl "Edward your looking a little too good right now."

I didn't answer. I didn't want to look at him right now espisally since I just saw an image that was so disturbing that I buried deeper into Bella's safe. _God I hope I don't get ass raped!_

I heard metal being torn apart a few times until I heard the lovely sound of the timer. Alice had gotten me and Bella got Jasper as to avoid kissing.

Emmett came in the room and started laughing his ass off at the sight of whatever Jasper had done I didn't look. I just followed Alice back out to the room got handcuffed but with only one hand to spin with it when Jasper came with clothes at hand for me and put it on for me and whispered "Sorry about the image I just could help it. We cool."

"Yeah I couldn't stay mad at you." I smiled.

"Thanks, man." "_I own you one"_ he patted my arm and went back to his seat.

I groaned at the fact that this still wasn't over.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. But I do own this story and who gets dared how they get dared*laughs evilly*. Music of the Night 999 helped me with this one.**

_Italic _= thoughts

**Chapter 4:**

**Edward's Turn**

Epov

I turned the bottle before Emmett handcuffed me again and sat in place. It continued to slow until first it passed Bella, then Alice, Jasper, Emmett. It fricking landed on Rosalie.

Then I smiled. Giving Rosalie a punishment was almost like toruing Emmett.

Alice squeal at my idea and started chatting "Do it!"

Rose looked at me with a cold look "What's the dare Edward?" she raised her eyebrow.

My smile got wilder as she thought though things that were completely off from my plan "You have to find every reflective object in this house, break it, burn it, and throw it away and you can't look at yourselves for a week and no one can do it for you."

She gave me her iciest glare "What!" she hissed.

"You heard me. Burn it. Burn it all!" I practically laugh. She gave me a hated glare before running upstairs grabbing the entire reflective surface and throwing all on the ground. She started to dry sob and jumped, stomped and crushes every thing. She pushes it all in one corner of the room making sure she got every fleck that had scattered on the ground, throwing it in the pile.

She started screaming "Burn!" as she started grabbing matches throwing one by one at time until the box was empty. She started crying more than ever. All Emmett could was staring in horror.

I was really enjoyed myseleve and Bella giggle periodically. Rose put out the fire and started shoveling it in a bag. She tried putting it all in one bag but it just kept breaking. She didn't stop until Renesmee came down in the morning.

"What's going on Aunt Rosie?" wiping the sleep from her eyes.

Bella called to her "Aunt Rose is just cleaning up a mess she made."

She ran to us "Mom, why are you two handcuffed to the wall."

"Uncle Emmett played a trick on us. Now go pack a bag. Your going over to Cousin Seth's house for a while but you can't see Jakey while your there." Bella told her calmly. She's so smart.

"Ok." then Renesmee walked over to Rosalie and said "Rosy don't you think you should get 2 bags instead of wasting a billion."

Rose cupped her cheek "Thanks sweetie." then she kissed my daughter's fore head before calmly picking everything up slowly.

When Rosalie FINALLY finished cleaning, Renesmee was running down stairs with her case "I'm already!" she said just like Spongebob Squarepants.

"Emmett uncuffs us we need to take her or you can't continue this." I stated.

Emmett pondered this "You can go but Bella stays right here with us." an evil grin spread across his face.

My eyes widen "What are you going to do to her?" my voice was panicked.

"Nothing, now you go along. We'll take care of her." Jasper said having the same evil twinkle in his eye.

I glanced over at Bella and she mouthed 'go'. Reluctantly I took Renesmee hand with one of mine and the other grabbed her luggage. I took one last glance back at Bella's golden eyes before speeding off…

It had only taken me 5 minutes to get to Seth's house and back on the winding road back to the house when if heard a scream, Bella's scream.


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer:**

**Me: Santa, can I own Twilight for Christmas?**

**Santa: No.**

**Me: Then I guess you have to die *pulls out an axe and tries 2 hit Santa**bright light appears***

**Chapter 5: Eggs and Chicken Fat**

I heard Bella's scream and took off. I kick in the door and its hinges flew off.

Then I saw why she was screaming. Emmett was pelting eggs at Bella but apparently then ran out and was throwing chicken fat. 

A growl ripped from my chest as I tackled Emmett to the ground. He dropped the chicken fat and it spilled on the floor and on Emmett.

Emmett frowned at me "Eddie. You ruined the fun."

Another growl ripped though "EMMETT WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU PELTING BELLA WITH EGGS AND CHICKEN FAT! WHERE DID YOU EVEN GET CHICKEN FAT IN THE FIRST PLACE?"

He rolled his eyes "1. It was fun and 2. I always carry storage of this stuff. Eddie you better calm down before you pop a blood vessel."

I just shook my head and smacked the back of his head.

Then someone smacked my head. I spun around to see Rosalie's smug face "Don't hit Emmett, that my job only."

She turned away from me and sudden I got very angry and whacked the back of her head.

She turned back and whacked the side of my head so hard I was hurled threw the air and into the wall.

I realized why I got so angry. Bella was fuming with angry, which got Jasper to accidentally send it to me.

I walked up to Jasper and smacked the back of his head. When I turned back Alice whacked my head and I hit the floor.

Her small form towered over me "Why you hit Jazz?"

I started to explain when Emmett hit me and I smashed into Rose. She smacked my head and sent me into Alice.

Bella broke out of her chains and smacked Rose's head. Jasper smacked my head. Then Emmett hit Bella's head and Bella whacked back.

Before we all knew it we were all in a huddle smacked everyone's head and yelling 'Why did you hit her/him'. Then the guys made the mistake of hitting their girls when someone ducked or dodged and then everyone was against each other.

That's when we all slipped on the chicken fat. It was terrible everyone was trying to get up but also tried to hit someone in the process.

Everyone was covered in eggs and chicken fat when we heard "OH MY GOD!" from Esme. No one even heard her.

But then another voice that we all heard and made us freeze where we kneeled.

"**WHAT THE FUCK HAPPEN TO MY HOUSE?!?!?!"** the voice growled with a thick venom laced into his growl.

All anyone could think was _"Daddy is home!"_


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer:**

**Me: Where am I?**

**God: In heaven.**

**Me: Why? I tried to kill Santa.**

**God: Well you know your story on ?**

**Me: Yeah.**

**God: Well Jesus thought it was so funny we let you into heaven. Oh and you get to wish for 1 thing before you go in the gateway.**

**Me: Can I own Twilight?**

**God: No.**

**Me: *pulls out a gun* Then die. *red flash of light***

**Chapter 6: Explaining it to Daddy**

CPOV

I was looking at us behind my desk while the rest of them were squeezed into the small couches of my study looking uncomfortable. They better be.

There had been a long silence ever since we entered the office and I decided to break "Will anyone care to explain why my house is in ruins?" my voice was laced with venom. Jasper tried to send calm waves at me but I just glared daggers at him until he stop.

Bella opened her mouth to speak but everyone went to cover it and Edward whispered something so low I couldn't hear it.

Then Bella removed all their hands and said "Why? It's the truth."

Alice then quickly replied in her ear. Bella crossed her arms "And what if I don't want to continue?"

Rosalie stood up with her hands on her hips "We'll rip off his dick!"

Bella looked at Edward then back to Rosalie "I can live with that." Edward's eyes widen.

Rosalie crossed her arms and gave Bella one of her coldest stares "You're buffing."

Bella stood up too. She wasn't as tall as Rosalie, if fact was she turned she actually got short enough for her to wear Alice's cloths and for it to fit properly.

"Try me." there was no way Bella was lying and Rose knew it and sat back down looking pissed as hell.

But Alice wasn't giving up on whatever it was because she hopped out of her spot on the couch "I'll take you on a shopping trip!" she chirped.

"I need some new clothes anyway."

"I'll take you on a shopping trip without Edward for a month in France!"

"I've been meaning to go sight seeing."

"I'll give you makeover!"

"Me and Edward have been planning to have a date."

"I'LL GIVE YOU A MAKEOVER IN FRANCE WITHOUT EDWARD FOR A YEAR AND EVERYDAY WE WILL GO SHOPPING UNTIL THEY KICK OUR ASSES OUT!"

"Either you gone gay or you are so fucking crazy that you won't have sex with Jasper for a year. Beside in case you haven't noticed I'm still a newborn so I'm stronger than you (Bella's eyes are gold because she has really great control)."

"I'LL TURN YOU GAY!" then Alice kissed a very surprise Bella square on her lips. Edward and Jasper got very aroused.

It seem as if nothing could get worse then Renesmee walked in with Seth and Jacob and said "Mommy we heard lots of screaming and OH HOLY CROW!"

"Damn!" said Seth shaking his head.

"I knew there was a reason she didn't want me!" said Jacob.

Bella finally broke out of Alice's grip and saw Renesmee standing there shocked out of her mind.

Renesmee finally shuddered out "Y-y-yo-o-ur gay." she barley whispered the last part.

Bella walked over to Renesmee shaking her head and hugged her "No, no, no. Alice got mad and kissed me."

This must have been traumatizing for her since she walked in when Edward and Bella were having sex and was use to it but now she saw something gay and was really confused.

She was taking time to process this then said "So Auntie Alice is gay."

Bella nodded "Yes. Alice is gay."

Alice put her hands on her hips "I am not gay!" she started walking towards them and Renesmee flipped Bella around and screamed "SAFE ME FROM THE GAY PEOPLE MOMMY! DON'T LET THEM TAKE ME, MOMMY! DON'T LET THEM GET ME, MOMMY!" she shaking her head the whole time and tried taking out Alice's legs with Bella's body.

She finally got Alice to trip but right on Bella. Renesmee screamed shoved both Bella and Alice across my office and into Rosalie. Then she grabbed on to Jacob's leg "DON'T LET THEM GET ME, JAKEY!" tears were free falling from her face as she bit her lip, a habit she picked up from Bella.

Bella, Alice, and Rosalie were in heap on the floor in front of the couch, out of view for Renesmee. As they started to get up, they groaned in pain.

Renesmee didn't understand what was going on and screamed "ROSALIE'S GAY, TOO! AND THEY'RE GOING TO RAPE MOMMY!" she grabbed Seth's leg and hurl him toward the heap and said "GO WOLFY, SETH AND SAFE MY MOMMY!"

Seth pulled Bella out and brings her to Renesmee. She pulled her into a tight hug and said "I thought they were going to get you, mommy." more tears fell.

I looked at everything and started laughing so hard I was pounding the desk for unneeded air. I got up still laughing and started shaking my head. I couldn't remember a time when I had laughed so hard. I grabbed my coat, walked out the door grabbed Esme, and called behind "Do whatever the fuck you want! Me and Esme are going to go buy another house! If you guys get sane, you're welcome to come!"

I was still laughing like a maniac and Esme looked concern. I just shook my head kissed her and said "Later."

We got in the car and peeled out.

**What do you thing? Am I awesome or crazy? I think a little of both. Find out what the fuck was going on and what they will do about poor, innocent, and scared for life Renesmee. **


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer:**

**Me: Where am I?**

**Devil: In hell.**

**Me: Ok. Let's take over Twilight.**

**Devil: K.**

**Me: Wait a second. What team are you on?**

**Devil: Team Jacob.**

**Me: You truly are the devil. TEAM VOLTURI IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN TEAM JACOB!!!!!!!**

**Devil: No way.**

**Me: *takes out axe* Then die!**

**Me: *slits devil's throat and drinks blood. Eyes flash red* my army! To Stephanie Meyers's house! Now!**

**Chapter 7: What do we do now? And Halloween comes 2 town!**

BPOV

Alice's lips taste like cherry lip gloss and Rosalie has on pink underwear with 'hottie' written on the butt. How do I know this? Because Alice kissed me on the mouth in front of everyone! And my criminally insane child throw me across the room and into Rosalie's butt!

That's the better part of my day. Yes. It is very sad.

**3 MONTHS LATER!!!!!**

Eventually Renesmee got over the whole gay seen. Mostly because Emmett got tried of stopping the game just to help Renesmee homophobia.

Not even 5 minutes into the conversation, he grabbed her whacked her over the head and put her in bed. Then the whole house took turns to whacking him until we caused enough brain damage to at least last another 1000 years.

When we questioned him why in HELL he would do that he slurred "When she wakes up, tell her it was a nightmare."

All of us were actually pretty surprised. Emmett of all people found a way to make me not seem gay in front of my daughter! HE'S A FREAKING GENIS!

**Apov**

It was Halloween time with the Cullen's and things were a bit crazy. Bella and Edward left about an hour ago to take Nessy trick-or-tricking and Emmett was pissed.

"God Alice! Why couldn't I go trick-or-tricking?!" Emmett groaned.

"Because Emmett I had a vision of you paintball the school and signing it 'the Cullen's were here'. I huffed. That was the 179th time Emmett had asked that question. I was getting really aggravated and if he asked 1 more time I …

"But why, Alice!" Emmett groaned again and I snapped. I picked him up by his collar and threw him at the stairs and screamed "**GO TO YOUR ROOM EMMETT OR I WILL MURDER YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**"

Emmett looked like he pissed his pants and scrambled up the stairs.

I sat by Jasper and the two blonds looked at each other than me. Jasper moved to a lighter topic because of the room's dead silence "Alice why did you construct a maze so terrifying that not even a drunk/high hippie would across to gain world peace."

I bounced in my seat "Because I love Halloween!"

Suddenly the doorbell rang. Emmett called from upstairs "I'll get it!"

He zoomed past us. But it was too late to stop him as the door popped open.

Why was it too late, you may ask? I smelled at least 20 of the most illegal drugs all over him.

**Emmett was high!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer:**

**At Meyer's house**

**Me: Hey! Stephanie! Can you give me Twilight?**

**Stephen: No**

**Me: Then I guess I'll have to kill you with my army of hell since I'm the new devil.**

**Stephen: Jacob! Take off your shirt!*Jacob jumps out of her house and pulls off his shirt and gives me his greatest smile***

**Me: That won't work on me! I'm team Volterra!**

**Stephen: Demetri, Felix, and Alec! Shirts off now!* They all walk out of the house and sexily remove their shirts and smile***

**Alec:*throws his arm around me* There is no need to fight. Now why don't you just go back to hell and tell your army the war is off. K.**

**Demetri:*starts licking some ice cream* Yes go back to hell. Tell the army to stop, please.**

**Felix:*starts taking a shower in his boxers* Go back to hell, my little devil girl.**

**Me:*starts hyperventilating* I don't know if I should. They would get pretty pissed.**

**Stephen: Seth come out!**

**Seth:*Is wet with his shirt off, in boxers, licking an ice cream cone. He cups my cheek* Please go back, my naughty little devil girl *winks at me***

**Me:*Hole to hell opens underneath me* I'LL BE BACKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!**

**Chapter 8: Steroid Boy!**

Apov

Emmett opened the door and yelled at the kids "Happy Halloween!" but it was slurred so it really did sound like he was high. Their were 2 kids in a football uniforms. They each looked about 12.

They held out their bags "Trick or treat!"

Emmett put his hands on their shoulders "Remember guys, don't use steroids when you're older or your dick will shirk!"

One of them scoffed and the other one said "Right back at you, Steroid Boy! How big's your dick? Oh yeah, that's right! You don't have one!" the other kid replied "Yeah, Steroid Boy! Where your dick! Pussy!"

Emmett grabbed the whole candy barrel and began pelting it at the kids, violently. We tried to pull his arms out of the barrel but they finally got up and ran away screaming. Emmett tried to chase after them but Rosalie started whacking the back of his head so hard he stopped and started crying. He gripped Rosalie's leg and yelled about the boys calling him Steroid Boy.

Eventually we got him off Rosalie's leg. Well actually she got him off after threatening to burn his Spice girls' collection.

Not even 10 minutes later I had a vision

_Emmett was running down the stairs with a bag full of white powder. Crystal Menthe and about 50 other of the most illegal drugs mixed together._

_He threw some at unsuspecting Jasper because he was trying to find out was I was having a vision about. Then when I opened my eyes again he threw some in my face, too. Then the doorbell rang. Me and Jasper got it._

Right when I opened my eyes white powder was thrown in my face. I accidentally got a whole bunch of it in my mouth and nose.

The last coherent thought I conceived was 'Damn it, Emmett!'


End file.
